Pornhub CEO Commits To Only Searching '18yo Teen' Instead of 'Teen' After Pressure From Credit Card Companies

Mon. December 14, 2020

Parts of this satirical piece where written by AI

WASHINGTON, DC—In response to pressure from credit card companies and the Federal Trade Commission, Mindgeek's (Pornhub's parent company) Founder Fabian Thylmann has agreed to only search for "18yo teen" instead of "teen."

"I'm glad we were able to come to an agreement with the FTC and credit card companies," said Thylmann. "It's important that I can still search for '18yo teen' instead of 'teen.' It's a small victory, but it's something."

The new policy will go into effect immediately on all Mindgeek websites, including Pornhub, YouPorn, RedTube, and Brazzers.

"We at Pornhub are committed to only searching for questionable content in a way that gives us plausible deniability. We're also committed to making sure our users can still find the content they want by modifying their searches for 'teen trapeze blowjob' to 'barely legal trapeze blowjob,'" said Pornhub's vice president, Corey Price.

"If I ever viewed any illegal content, it was totally by accident," said Price. "I'm not a monster."

The FTC and credit card companies have been pressuring Mindgeek to change its search policies for months, but the company has resisted until now.

"As much as we at Pornhub recognize the demand for searches like '1000-year-old lolli surprisingly not 1000 years old,' at the end of the day our integrity is more important to us. The credit companies that stopped processing transactions on our site made that very clear."

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